Wednesday, December 22, 2010

The Beef 'O' Brady's Bowl St. Petersburg Awards

Good Lord, man, how can you possibly still be talking about the Beef 'O' Brady's Bowl?  Because my fascination with a public event and restaurant named after what someone thought a fictional portly Irishman would be named shall never end.  AND YOU'LL LIKE IT.  So much like the Nachos 'O' Brady, smothered with queso and all the other fixins, I'm gonna get a little more mileage out of this thing as we honor some of Tuesday night's players with a dish right out of the Beef 'O' Brady's kitchen based on their performance.

Much like I envision the patrons of this establishment, there was no real MVP of this game, just some steady, forgettable performances.  I had plans for the MVP to receive a three-course meal in his honor, but no one truly deserved a food coma meal.  So, when in doubt, you give whatever the highest honor is to the winning quarterback.

Justin Burke, QB, Louisville

Nothing flashy, just like 20-32, 178 yards, 2 TDs and 0 INTs, but solid. Could have done worse, could have done better, as does the person ordering this. In the end, he didn't make any killer mistakes and got the job done until the next game. Interesting note about Watterson, the first customer, he was also the first person to puke in the restaurant and experience diabetic shock when he returned home.

Jeremy Wright, RB, Louisville

Much like the most dangerous thing on the menu, Wright was Louisville's biggest hit to the core of Southern Miss with his 95-yard kickoff return early in the fourth quarter, as Southern never challenged the end zone again.

Austin Davis, QB, Southern Miss
Quentin Pierce, WR, Southern Miss

Wraps usually carry a sense of "I would like to eat something relatively healthy today," even though they're usually slathered in mayo or some type of secret sauce. However, Beef 'O' Brady's laughed at that notion and created yet another combination that allowed them to feature meat and cheese products. It is a most unusual combination (and exceptionally deadly) much like USM's Pierce and Davis changing their roles and having Davis do the catching of the pass.



Peter Boehme, P, Southern Miss

CHAMPION OF DOZENS OF SUPER SAMPLERS.

Click to enormosize

Desmond Johnson, RB, Southern Miss

Though I had to strain through the typical fog of not remembering anything that happened within the last 12 hours to remember his long touchdown run, there is a rule somewhere that requires special recognition of all running backs who hit the 100-yard mark. Congratulations, Desmond. Enjoy burping Guinness gravy for the next 24 hours.

Special Teams, Southern Miss

The Least Valuable Player in the game deserves the meal that is Most Likely to Make You Vomit on Your Table and Everyone at Your Table. This unit surrendered a kickoff return for a touchdown, short-hopped a snap on a punt, resulting in the Super Sampler punter being tackled, and they had a field goal blocked. You should expect your tartar sauce to be extra bitter.

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