Just a few days after becoming his own Mardi Gras float, which was the greatest float in the history of every parade ever, Les Miles was invited to throw out the first pitch of Friday night's baseball game in LSU's weekend series with Cal-State Fullerton. When the announcement was made, the Internet roared with speculation as to what was going to happen during this pitch. I read everything from hitting the mascot to hitting three players yet still having the ball cross the heart of the plate to launching into a maniacal laughter and throwing the ball over the center field fence. It was all in play and perfectly believable. I even Tweeted that he would most certainly sample the infield grass at Alex Box Stadium, which, of course, he did and even gave a blade to baseball coach Paul Mainieri.
But, what no one even considered was that Les Miles would show up, as a millionaire adult, to a public event wearing WINDSUIT PANTS.
People who wear windsuit pants in public (excluding participation in sports, which this was not; it's baseball) have either given up on life and are choosing not to compete in society anymore (tip of the hat to Seinfeld), are horribly sick and staring blankly at the cold and flu medicine options in the pharmacy section of Walgreen's or simply do not give a damn because they have more money and power than you or anyone else around.
Les Miles is not the first two in that list. He's a man getting paid millions to haphazardly coach a football team the the brink of self-destruction, only to miraculously turn that near self-destruction into the total annihilation of his opponent's will to live. And that kind of power gives him the right to wear windsuit pants in public. Don't you dare change, Les Miles. DON'T EVER CHANGE.