Friday, February 26, 2010

Five Stories to Follow for Your Weekend

In between being bored and completing a list of chores that you already know is headed your way, here are five stories to watch that could possibly give you more than five minutes of entertainment.

The United States men's hockey team looking for another shot at the 800-pound monster with a chainsaw as its unit; otherwise known as Team Canada.
We play Finland today at 2 CST and if we win we'll most likely play Canada in the gold medal game as the Canadians face Slovakia, a team they are expected to treat like Brad Wesley treated the people in his town pre-Dalton, later tonight. If we get by Finland, and I assume we are the favorites, I cannot stress the importance of beating Canada in the gold medal game. Yes, it would be awesome to see the United States beat Canada in a sport that is so much more important to so many more people to our north. Plus, the thought of the thousands of shots of Wayne Gretzky and his wife (an American) cheering on the Canadians makes me want to vomit. But most importantly, if Canada wins, that means that in some way Nickelback wins too. And that is completely unacceptable. So I strongly encourage everyone to get on the bandwagon and support the US team this weekend. You may not like hockey, but I know you hate Nickelback and that's something for which we can all cheer.

The Canadian women's hockey team has a throw down on the ice.
After beating the US women's team in the gold medal game, members of the Canadian team came back out onto the ice for a picture after all the spectators were out of the building. In addition to themselves, they brought booze and cigars and had themselves a small party on the ice. Nothing wrong with that until pictures of the event made it to the Internet, which gave people a chance to jump on their high horse and condemn such behavior, most notably the IOC, which will "investigate" the matter (whatever that means. I think we're all pretty clear on what happened. Canada wins. Goes onto ice with beer and cigars to celebrate. End of events.). I'm not sure what sort of punishment the IOC can hand out, but I have a feeling it won't be directed at themselves for having the Winter Olympics in Vancouver, where it's 50 degrees and doesn't snow this time of year.

The NFL combine starts its business tomorrow.
Players invited to the combine can expected to be poked with sticks, herded from room to room or station to station, stand semi-nude for long periods of time and take a test that allegedly determines if one is an idiot or not. Minus the test, it really is sort of like a cattle auction (although if cows had opposable thumbs, I'm sure they would have to take a test). And you can see it all on DirecTV! I'll be looking to see how fat Alabama's Terrance Cody is and if it's possible that Dexter McCluster can run the 40 in 3.85 seconds. I say marginally fat and yes he will.

The Olympics will end, but will the ceremony debacles continue for Vancouver?
The closing ceremonies will take place on Sunday and who isn't excited about the possibility that something else will go wrong? While I could not be more excited, I will not actually watch because those things are so painfully long and boring. Now, if great Canadians such as Mike Myers, Jim Carrey, Will Arnett, Avril Lavigne and Alanis Morissette are involved, I'm potentially interested.

An assortment of college basketball games will take place.
I'm sure there's at least one you'll find worth watching. Enjoy your two days of freedom.

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