On Saturday, the 136th Kentucky Derby will be run at Churchill Downs (I know, I forgot to write it down in my calendar too. It sort of slips up on you. Small aside at the beginning of an introductory paragraph: Do the people in charge of this event randomly select a spring weekend each year or is there a set date, like the last weekend in April? Because I have no idea. I feel like the Kentucky Derby is something that should be embedded in my mental calendar but never is. Additional aside: While I have never been to the Kentucky Derby, I have been to Churchill Downs. It's a long story involving an incredibly insane explanation of our family vacations when I was growing up. And as much as horse racing doesn't really appeal to me, I would thoroughly enjoy attending this thing at least once in my life. Let's see...yes, end of asides.). So, with the spirit of horse racing coursing through my veins, I did some checking around and found that most all of the coaches in the SEC dabble in horse racing, many of them owning multiple horses. Though none of their horses made the field at Churchill Downs, I'm sure many will be appearing in a buggy race at a county fair near you.
(Given the title of this post, you can now rest easy since the following is not a lengthy list of players on which I have a giant man-crush, although that list will come in due time.)
Your coaches and their horses:
Nick Saban
Shitstorm
Accountability
No Sleep in T-Town
Houston Nutt
Controlled Chaos
Awesome Responsibility
Coach Frank Broyles
Dan Mullen
Horse from the School Down South
Cam Newton How Dare You
I'm Available to Talk
Les Miles
YYYAHHHHHH!!!
Fourth Downs Are Easy
SDF)()S&SKLVCN>SDl!!!!
Bobby Petrino
The Hessians Are My People
Forget About Atlanta
Opt Out
Gene Chizik
Left My Losing in Ames
Friend of Jay Jacobs
Gus is Alright
Urban Meyer
Addazio the Figurehead
Fast, Faster, Fastest
Jeremy Fowler Sucks
Derek Dooley
Callin' Ruston
Doctor Coach Speak
Joker Phillips
Finally
Old Man Picked Up His Golf Clubs
Steve Spurrier
Gonna Throw It Around
Stephen, What the Hell?
Ain't Got Time for This
Bobby Johnson
None
("Horse racing is the work of the devil. Get off my football field.")
Mark Richt
None
(Sold his horses for a quarterback.)
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