Alabama 20, Tulane 6
Welcome back to Earth, Alabama. John Parker Wilson remembered that he is John Parker Wilson and turned in a solid 11 of 23, 73 yard performance. Luckily for Alabama, the Georgia Dome hangover can last another week since the Western Kentucky (cue David Kellum voice...got it...) Hilltoppers!!! come to town on Saturday.
Arkansas 28, Former Directional School 27
Another directional school (or at least one-time directional school) and another fourth quarter rally by the Hogs. Bobby Petrino may be a jerk, but the man has some fourth quarter magic against these schools. No word yet on Petrino's resignation once the SEC schedule gets too tough.
Auburn 27, Southern Miss 13
So long Kodi Burns, we hardly knew ye. I watched the better part of this game and the few times Burns got in, he was horrible. Just horrible. Chris Todd, while not spectacular, didn't do anything stupid and was able to move the offense. If his running backs hadn't fumbled three times, this game would have been a blowout. Does anyone else find it funny that Auburn completely changed its offense and the new offense is probably just as boring to watch as the last one? It's sort of like someone being disgusted with their Ford Taurus and saying, "I need a change. What I need is a Chevy Malibu!"
Florida 26, Miami 3
Thank you Urban Myer for the tack-on field goal with 25 seconds left. There were honest, decent folks out there who needed a miracle cover by the Gators. You excited a group much larger than the Florida fanbase. Kudos to you, good sir.
Georgia 56, Central Michigan 17
Knowshon Moreno cures cancer, loves babies, walks on water, blah, blah, blah.
Kentucky 38, Norfolk State 3
Location for Norfolk State? Anyone?
Wake Forest 30, Ole Miss 28
After a violent hissy fit, I managed to calm down and put together some rational thoughts on this game:
-Doesn't matter who coaches, Shrimpboat, Joe Lee Dunn, or Houston Nutt, this sort of crap will never stop. I announced to the room with Ole Miss down 27-21 that we would lose by a field goal. No one believed me because they're morons. True Ole Miss fans can always sense evil on the horizon.
-I sensed a looming disaster when we didn't take advantage of a 14-10 lead in the third quarter. Two possessions with the lead ended in two turnovers. That can't happen with the shaky defense we have.
-"And Cassius Vaughn gets beat to the corner." Direct quote from the play-by-play guy after a Wake Forest touchdown pass. I have a feeling we'll hear that a lot this year.
-Here's to Kendrick Lewis for keeping the time-honored Ole Miss defender tradition of completely overrunning the play when he whizzed by Riley Skinner who casually stepped aside and threw a deep ball, earning a pass interference call on Marshay Green.
-As for the good, Jevan Snead is slowly helping dull the pain of the Ethan Flatt-Micheal Spurlock-Robert Lane-Seth Adams-Brent Schaeffer Experience. Hard to believe that an offense works when you have a competent, warm body lining up under center.
-One more thing, Shay Hodge is really, really good.
State 34, Directional School 10
46 rushes, 27 passes. Scott Field is not burned to the ground. All-in-all a good weekend for the Bulldogs.
From places outside the SEC...
-More airtime this week on ESPN: Chris Wells' foot or Tom Brady's knee? Regardless, I think Wells' foot and Brady's knee should get an apartment together.
-Vince Young may need some crazy pills. Look, I know your career quarterback rating is 68.3 and you've thrown 32 interceptions to just 22 touchdowns, but Vince, seriously, disappearing into the cornfield isn't a good option.