Tuesday, June 26, 2007

The ACT versus Orgeron

Last time around we saw Ed Orgeron stomp Mike Ditka into a fine paste in their head-to-head showdown. The shrimp boat captain's brawling, alligator wrestling tactics were simply too much for the former Bears and Saints coach, who seemed a little distracted by trade talks for former 49ers quarterback, Steve Bono. By the time Ditka realized he wasn't a coach and Bono doesn't play anymore, Orgeron had already tied him into a figure eight.

This week, Coach O goes up against another formidable foe in the ACT. While not as physically imposing as Ditka, the ACT has been giving Ole Miss athletics fits for years. And years. So how will Coach Orgeron handle it? Let's go to the tale of the tape.


Height: N/A
Weight: Heavy.
Strengths: Very smart and organized. Requires opponent to give full concentration at all times. Has the ability to hold someone's future over them in a cruel way. Often dominates athletes.
Weaknesses: Comes in a paper form. Can be fooled into not knowing the difference between "Chris Strong" and Chris Strong.
Intangibles: A savvy veteran.

Ed Orgeron

Height: 6'1"-ish
Weight: 220-ish
Strengths: Hmmmm.....let's see. The aforementioned alligator wrestling and bare knuckle fighting. He also is good at headbutting people and if need be, he could probably unhinge his jaw and eat someone. And even though they're implied in all those things, let's add intensity, rage, and hate.
Weaknesses: Coaching football and getting players that meet admissions requirements on campus.
Intangibles: I think alligator wrestling pretty much covers all the bases here.

The Result:
Another tough call. The ACT has dominated Ole Miss in the past, sending many potential athletes into the junior college ranks where they would eventually leave and sign with another school. Orgeron suffered early at the hands of the ACT, but has recently come storming back. Most notably with Chris Strong, who has allegedly made a qualifying score. If Strong does in fact attend Ole Miss in the fall, I think we could chalk up another win for Orgeron. Until then, I will call this match a draw.

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